Tuesday, July 26, 2016
I Am What I Am
But by the grace of God I am what I am, and his grace to me was not without effect. No, I worked harder than all of them--yet not I, but the grace of God that was with me. 1 Corinthians 15:10 NIV
I had some time alone this past weekend.
By alone I mean no husband and no children. I still had the two dogs and my twenty year old was home, but between her work and going out, I was basically alone. Like many of you, that is a very rare occurrence for me.
I have to tell you, as much as I get nervous when my children travel , I was a little excited about the alone time.
I had plans.
I was going to eat and watch TV.
I was going to do what I wanted to do.
And I was going to do it uninterrupted.
But it stormed, and there was no power.
I can deal with this...
"Dear Lord, why? Why did you do this? I only get one night. Did it really have to storm tonight?"
I suppose it wasn't a prayer as much as it was a discussion.
Ok, so it was more like whining.
Eventually, the power came back on, I warmed up my dinner and settled in with a movie.
It was very enjoyable, and I was able to relax. As parents of children with extra challenges and special needs, I think we learn to adapt and find unique ways to recharge. But I was grateful to have a chance at what I felt was a "normal" thing.
A night alone, to do what I want.
As the movie went on I decided a little watermelon would be nice so I paused my movie and walked into the kitchen. I was filling my bowl I thought to myself, "What if I was one of those people? What if this was my life? What if I just worked and came home and watched TV and ate, uninterrupted? What if..."
As I placed the watermelon back into the refrigerator, I paused and took in the contents...
The tuna salad that Myra loves.
Ava's favorite drink.
My husband's coffee creamer.
And I realized...
By the grace of God I am what I am.
There is not a lot of easy in living, and I suppose that is for the best. Easy slides by you, you don't always remember easy. It doesn't often leave an impression, it rarely changes and shapes you.
But hard, hard presses against you. Hard is felt. Hard scrapes past your life and it leaves a mark. It changes you and creates places in your existence. You remember hard.
By the grace of God....
The things we have been through, our experiences, our struggles, our circumstances, our reactions...
Those things, by the grace of God, have shaped us into who we are.
And I am thankful that...
I am what I am.
My prayer for you:
God our Father, our Creator, I pray that our hearts remember and our eyes are always focused on that fact. You created us, You created our children. We take comfort in knowing that you also shaped the paths our lives are set on. Help us not to loose sight that there is a purpose for every hard moment that presses against us in this life. Open our eyes Father, so that when we look at the imprints and scars of hardships and struggles on our lives we see Your Grace. Amen
Hello there...my name is Beth. I'll be your tour guide today. I will start off by telling you that this blog focuses mainly on life, and our life has some Jesus, Autism and little humor in it. I have five wonderful children, four girls and one incredible 16 year old boy who is severely impacted by...you guessed it...Autism. Stick around...read, I would love to hear from you so don't hesitate to comment and if you have a question, just ask!