Thursday, October 23, 2014

Devoted to Doing Good

Photo Courtesy of Gualberto 107/
Do everything you can to help Zenas the lawyer and Apollos on their way and see that they have everything they need. Our people must learn to devote themselves to doing what is good, in order to provide for urgent needs and not live unproductive lives.  Titus 3:13-14

This week we embark on a new adventure.  For 10 years we were seeing the same doctors in Madison, WI.  They had seen us through good times and bad.  They had delivered us both exciting news and devastating news.  They had become trusted, loyal, and steadfast companions in our WAGR Syndrome journey.  

But that chapter comes to a close and we now turn our eyes to the medical professionals in California.  They don't know us.  They don't know our history.  They don't know I'm a blogger.  They don't know we're Christians.  They don't know that we count on prayer as much as we do medicine.  They don't know that Evie still rocks back and forth to sooth herself so she always has snarled hair on the back of her head.  They don't know how amazing she is at singing and dancing...or that her speech didn't really develop until she was 4 or 5...that she didn't walk until she was closer to 3. 
They don't know.
I have to remember this. 
I also have to remember that God has instructed us, through Paul, to devote ourselves to doing only what is good.  That means I cannot easily become frustrated, nor quick to anger as we acclimate ourselves and our doctors to this new chapter in our lives.  

This could be the most challenging part for me, because when I feel confused I get frustrated, and when I get frustrated I panic, and when I panic I cry and can't hold my emotions's hard to DO GOOD when you can't control your thoughts; when you can't control your emotions.

I think I'll write out a note card for the binder that I carry to appointments ~the card will read:
Do ONLY what is GOOD in order to LIVE a PRODUCTIVE life. 
I'll give you a brief example of what I've already had to do concerning one of the appointments.  

I received a call from the oncology group we will see in California.  The person who called to get us scheduled gave me a date which was only about 3 days away from when she called.  I said, "I'm sorry, but I can't pull her out of school this early in the school year.  Can we schedule something for October?" She offered me a date in October, but it was quite early in the morning which led me to ask, "Will she have an ultrasound performed before the appointment?"  (After all, why meet with an oncologist if you don't have a current "picture" of the area that once had cancerous tumors, right?).  She told me "no" that "we don't schedule those without a referral."  I said, "Okay, I'll give our primary doctor a call and get that referral."  Her tone was quite huffy with everything she said, so I even tried to smooth things over by saying, "Please, don't be offended.  We are new here, and everything was done in one hospital in Madison.  This is new to me."  

To make a long story short, every conversation I've had with this person has felt "yucky".  She's been short with me; inflexible, and sarcastic.  "Do you have a copy of your daughter's ultra sound to give to the oncologist?" she asked the last time I spoke with her, "I KNOW you don't want to see the doctor without it...". 
Do ONLY what is GOOD in order to LIVE a PRODUCTIVE life.
I'll admit; I'm afraid to meet her face to face.  I'm afraid that I'll lose my cool.  I'm afraid that I will lose the filter that holds all my biting come-backs inside of me.  When this post publishes at 6 am CST, we will be just leaving our house to drive the 2 1/2 hours to our appointments.  
If you could, please say a prayer for me.  

Pray:  Father God, I need the Holy Spirit to take over my heart and my emotions.  When I'm not focused on you, my human side takes over; the selfish, threatened, bitter part of me that says "Why do we have to go through all of this???".  Take my heart and soften it as I communicate with the professionals with whom we come into contact.  I want them to see Jesus through my words, actions, and faith.  The only way I can do that is by doing good, and living a productive life with a legacy of peace, forgiveness and patience behind me.  Amen.

~Tammie Hefty


  1. I'm sorry I didn't see your post in time - but I said a prayer for you anyway. I hope all went well for all of you.

    1. Thank you so much! I appreciate the prayers. Some of the appointments went well, and others were a little rocky, but things are smoothing out as we go! Blessings to you!