Every mom wants it. Often it’s especially hard for your child to have one when they have a condition that makes life more challenging for various reasons.
One that isn’t just an
acquaintance or a friend when it’s convenient.
One of those friends that will tell your child when their being stupid,
but still love them anyway. Just one
friend. They already have so much to deal with. Can't a good friend come along? Is that too much to ask for?
David had many “friends”. Sometimes he didn’t treat them very
well. Sometimes he left them by the
wayside for a while. Many didn’t really
understand Borderline Personality Disorder and soon ran when the symptoms would
present themselves. Some of those that ran would return, but many never came
back. He had many “friends”, but usually
felt so alone. Fortunately, he had a few
true blue friends. Unfortunately, his
condition often caused him to alienate them.
I am so thankful for those friends that stuck with him even when he sometimes
didn’t stick with them.
One such friend was Matt. Matt never gave
up on David. When everyone else was jumping ship he
was always there, always available, always ready to jump back in if David would
call upon his support and friendship.
When David’s illness was manifesting itself in some nasty ways, Matt
took it in stride. He was gracious and kind even
when faced with rejection at times.
I thought of this recently when I was
listening to someone at a church describe how they didn’t want their child
hanging out with “that girl” because
she was a patient at a local mental health hospital and had been on suicide
watch and was a cutter. Oh no! God forbid that your child hang out with
someone that is dealing with those issues in life. Their child didn’t have any of these concerns
in their life and seemed pretty well adjusted.
It was painful to listen to and brought back similar memories. I can understand that some kids can’t or
shouldn’t be close to certain people because of their own weaknesses like not
wanting to hang out with someone that will cause them to probably stumble.
However, there are many others that have a diagnosis that doesn’t fall into the category of “This person is not good for
me to hang out with.” I am so thankful
for those kids that, like Matt, took the time to really be a friend. I know many special needs kids just want to have a
friend. They don’t want others to treat
them like they have leprosy even if they do have “leprosy”. They want a friend that will touch their
life. They want a friend like Matt.
I know David faired a whole lot better when he was hanging out with friends that were a good example too. Matt had a way of bringing out the best in David. His symptoms were less severe when he was around him. Friendship is good medicine.