Friday, November 23, 2012

A PEEK INSIDE MY JOURNAL SERIES: Worn-Out But Looking Up

Image: FreeDigitalPhotos.net
*Thursday...

I am suffering from some serious burnout and feelings of defeat.  Both at home and in ministry, there is a constant pouring-out of myself.  But right now, I am not feeling refilled.

The kids are endlessly demanding.  Their whining and fighting is continual.  They trash the house faster than I can clean it.  And I have to sit on them, mostly W, to get their school work done.

When it comes to ministry, the situation isn't that much different.  Some people are very selfish volunteers.  They'll agree to help, but they set up restrictions to their help so that it's really no help at all.  It makes my work that much harder.  Why can't people just see an area of need and step into it?  I want to cry!

To top it all off, I lost my regular Thursday afternoon childcare, so I don't know how I'll ever get my work done.  God help me!

I cry out to You, Yahweh!  This is all Yours anyway.  If Your desire is for my children to grow up as sound, capable, loving soldiers for Your kingdom, then send me the help to make it happen.  If Your desire is to reach special needs families, give them hope, and glorify Yourself through their trials, then send me the workers, willing, humble, capable workers, to accomplish the vision You've given me.

"I lift up my eyes to the mountains—
    where does my help come from? 
 My help comes from the Lord,
    the Maker of heaven and earth."
~ Psalm 121:1-2, NIV ~ 

*Footnote:  Journal posts are taken from past years on my special needs journey, offering parents a chance to identify with another person who has faced similar emotions and circumstances.

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