Tuesday, June 7, 2011
Surrendering the Need to Know Why
Each morning let me learn more about your love because I trust you. I come to you in prayer, asking for your guidance. ~ Psalm 143:8, CEV
Let me hear of your unfailing love each morning, for I am trusting you. Show me where to walk, for I give myself to you. ~ Psalm 143:8, NLT
This weekend my husband and I will celebrate your nineteenth wedding anniversary. And while all of those years haven't been a bed of roses, I would say that we've grown to know each other better and better through both adversity and joy. We've come to understand one another's strengths and challenges. When my husband does certain things in his areas of expertise, such as the lawn, the car or the mechanicals on the house, I don't need to ask him "Why?" because I realize that he knows what he is doing, while I, in turn, am utterly clueless.
Our relationship with the Sovereign Lord is much the same. To our great benefit, our God is the God of relationship. He wants to spend time with us daily, sharing His heart with us and having us share our hearts with Him. He wants us to get to know Him better each day. While we can never completely get our minds around an omnipotent, omniscient, all-powerful God, He wants us to grow in understanding of His character, who He is and how He works. He is anxious to pour out His lavish love upon us, not harm us. He sets boundaries in our lives for our safety, for our good and for His glory. How precious that relationship becomes as we draw close to Him!
With that level of intimacy and understanding, why would it be necessary that I continue to question what He's doing? While my husband may do some things that seem unloving, I've grown to know him well enough over the past nineteen plus years that I realize there's more than meets the eye. He may be clumsy (in his humanity) or forgetful, but he still loves me. How much more then does a perfect God love us the same, unencumbered by all of the human shortcomings?
Parents of children with special needs can find themselves stuck in a question of "Why?". Why me? Why my child? Why aren't things getting better? Why won't the school cooperate? Why won't the doctors take me seriously? Why does everything have to be such a battle? Why would a loving God allow this?
To be brutally frank, I have found these questions to be pretty useless because for the most part, we will never know the answers to the majority of them. But that does not leave me feeling bitter or frustrated. I have quickly grown to a place where I can surrender my need to know why.
You see, I have grown to intimately know the One who has my very best at heart. When I keep my eyes fixed on Him, I can trust that He has things handled without needing to know the whys. If He allows something in my life, I know that it touches Him before it ever touches me. I know He alone has the ability to create good things out of messy circumstances. He alone creates beauty from ashes.
Now, lest I sound like a complete Pollyanna, let me assure you that this does not mean that I don't assert myself when I run into road blocks with school staff, medical staff or even family members. But it does mean that I'm much calmer and courteous when I trust fully that He'll work everything out in the end. Do I get irritated and frustrated? Yes! But I don't become obsessed and undone by a circumstance. I realize that there is much that goes on behind the scenes in any given situation, and that is where the God of both seen and unseen has to work on my behalf. Because I know what a gem He is, that I am His friend, and that He loves me passionately, I don't have to worry that He'll get the job done. I just run to Him with my troubles and rely on Him to do what He does best.
My friend, my prayer for you today is that you grow in intimacy with the Lover of your soul, so that you can surrender your need to know why in life's upsetting situations. He had things all figured out before you even appeared on the world stage. Is He not capable then of handling your day to day troubles? He loves you more than any human ever could, even giving His very life for you! Does that not deserve your devotion and attention? Know this, the One who holds the planets in place is the same One who rose from the dead to make a way for you to be with Him in bliss forever. Rest assured then that He can be trusted with all of the hurts and confusions that confront you every day of your life.